Five Hours of Funeral, Family, and Fhospital (I am alliteration's bitch)

So, I had to go to a funeral today.  Obviously a downer but Uncle Fred was all kinds of awesome so I forbear.  I meet up with the rest of the family at the funeral home a little before 11, which is when the whole funfest is supposed to get going, did a little mingling and we made our way into the chapel.  Now, I'm not really into reviewing funerals but this one was both very nice, and kind of awkward.  There were multiple speakers, both preachers and family, and lots of personal anecdotes shared.  At one point a poll was taken as to how many of us had eaten one of Uncle Fred's famous fried pies (my hand went up) and there was also talk of his hunting, fishing, and banana pudding.  There were two key awkward moments in the service; one when we were all asked to join in the singing of a hymn though no one had the actual words in front of them, and two when one of the preachers was talking about how he (and I quote) "admired his superb body."  I couldn't tell if anyone else was thrown by this but I gotta say it was a distraction for me.

On the (long) way to the cemetery we went from the East-West Connector at Austell Road west toward Paulding County.  On the way I counted 10 and a half old Georgia flags (you know the one) all before we got into Paulding.  The half was on a Punt Perdue sign.  One of the yards with racist flags also had some oh-so-tasteful statues in the front yard that weren't at all offensive.  We also made our way through Hiram which is not in any way rustic or tiny.  It seems more developed than Dville (though no mall) with possibly every type of restaurant there is--there may even be a Charley's there.

Later at the cemetery there was more singing, these songs were ones everyone knew and it was actually really nice.  The military (air force?) guys did the flag and played taps.  Afterwards in the milling about and chatting I don't know how many times I was asked about law school (I think I'm going to come up with some ridiculous answer to the general questions because I can only keep this press-junket style nonsense up for so much longer so suggestions are welcome).  I was also hugged too long by a male cousin, who accompanied his lingering hug with an apology for how he 'used to be'--I have no idea what this means.

From the cemetery I expected my mother to drive me back to the funeral home where my car was, but she said we were right down the road from the mountain so we'd drop my grandmother off then she'd take me back.  This was an attempt by my mother to kidnap me.  About an hour and a half later we were at the hospital visiting my other grandmother where the lady who's been sitting with her and my mother commence to quiz her on names and other facts that she obviously can't answer, as if alzheimer's is something that will go away if you work hard enough at it.  Anyway, after more awkward and depressing small talk I was finally taken to my car and allowed to make my way home.  Not the best day ever.  Plus, I find it ridiculous that you have to pay to park at Cobb Hospital!